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Holiday gatherings can be frustrating, especially when you have to deal with high-conflict people. It takes an exceptional level of patience, but it is not impossible.

High-conflict people or HCPs have a behavior pattern that causes them to increase conflict instead of resolving it. This can be particularly difficult to address in a room full of people who are supposed to be having fun at a party during the holidays. Here are some tips you can do to effectively go through this season's festivities when you know you have to deal with an HCP.

Manage your expectations

At this point, you should be able to honestly admit to yourself that the perfect holiday does not exist. And if you have a family member who is an HCP, you can probably predict that some kind of conflict is going to arise during a holiday gathering. 

Most likely, conflicts arise during gatherings due to some past arguments. However, HCPs tend to play the victim and blame others, so do not expect to get an apology from them for what happened in the past. Instead, learn to appreciate the present.

Learn when to change the subject

HCPs are typically emotionally unstable, which is likely a response to trauma or some mental health issue. When you feel like a topic is about to start an argument, try to change the subject without triggering the start of another one.  

Take a break

While being around the people you care about is important, do not forget to prioritize your mental well-being during this time of the year. Take a break when you need to, even if it is just to go outside, be alone and breathe.