What to Do When You Feel Behind Everyone Else
The feeling that your life is stuck while everyone else's is moving forward can be extremely painful. You may go on Facebook and see the people you went to high school with announcing their engagements, a new move, getting a dog or landing their dream job. When you talk to others, you get the impression that they all have something to strive for and are eagerly working toward their goals while you just feel stuck and incapable of getting anything, even if the things you want aren't extravagant at all.
You may long to get your license, earn a degree or start a job that makes you feel proud of yourself. These goals are all great, but with a defeatist mindset, they'll bring you pain instead of motivation. To overcome the idea that everyone is more successful than you, you have to dig deep and start making some definitive decisions. This is the only way you can start to progress and see the change you so desperately crave.
Practice Shifting Attention from Comparison to Self-Admiration
When your mind is on everyone else, how can you possibly have the energy to focus on building up yourself? Self-admiration doesn't make you a narcissist or self-righteous. The best way to begin feeling like you can make changes in your life is to recognize all the awesome potential you hold inside of you. If you're able to imagine something, you're able to at least try and achieve it. Embrace all the dreams you have, all the things you want, and take pride in the fact you are able to envision things you desire so strongly. Whenever you find yourself slipping back into the comparison mindset, gently shift gears and remind yourself that your life is the only one you need to focus on.
Start Researching How to Make Your Goals a Reality
If you want to achieve something, you have to work toward it and keep working even when there isn't immediate change. One of the most discouraging things for those who feel stuck in a rut is that their efforts always seem to be pointless. They put themselves out there only to notice no difference, so they figure why bother and stop trying altogether. This cycle will go on forever if you don't tell yourself that there's more to achievement than instant gratification.
Stop fantasizing about your dreams and lamenting over the fact everyone else seems to easily attract what you want. Instead, set some specific goals and begin researching what it would require to make them happen. For example, if your dream is to get a better job, you may want to go back to school and earn a degree in your desired field. If that requires money you don't have, start looking into financing options. Even if you don't qualify for scholarships right now, you could get a student loan from a private lender to invest in your future and worry about paying for tuition after you graduate.
Start Trying New Things
Make a goal to try one new thing every week. It could be trying a new recipe, watching a new show or going to an exercise class instead of sitting at home on a Friday night. If you infuse at least one new thing into your life each week, you'll begin to realize there is far more for you to experience in the world than your own ideas. It's incredibly important to expose yourself to new forms of stimulation, so pick up that book you've had lying about for years or sign up for some language classes. Even something as small as cleaning your room can begin to make you feel like there is hope for creating change in your life.